September fast approaching and lim twitching for school

For the first time in 20 years I wont be going to school in the fall. I thought it wouldn't be an issue, hahahahah was I wrong. I keep looking at course calenders and classes for institutions I can attend after work. Im not even settled into my job yet and I would love nothing more to return to school. I am greatful for my job but something about academia calls to me. Perhaps if I get myself more involved in music and things I enjoy the urge will go away. But this is like an itch Im unable to scratch.

Moving forward is not what I expected, not overly difficult but heart wrenchingly realistic.

Halfway to crazy but all creativity

So I have finished working at Lowe's. I will miss every one there, my co-workers were awesome. However I wasn't able to keep doing 7 days a week any more.
16/16 days of straight work are complete now I have my first weekend off since may!
Im tired and punchy but I have fringe! So happy to be volunteering at the Hamilton Fringe Festival, Im making friends and just having a blast!
Day two today!

Sharing dreams and new adventures with people. 3 days Until Montreal! Im just so thrilled!

Life is looking up and moving forward, squee!

July

As it is July First HAPPY CANADA DAY! I've made it this far. Recently I graduated from university got a job, then another job, then  a third job related to my second job and a fourth job teaching in my field. Now Im quitting my first job because my second job offered me 35 guaranteed hours a week. I'm very much looking for ward to not working 6-7 days a week and having time off.

It's all very exciting, I'm currently working on my passport application, extension on my OHIP and renewing my drivers license and health card. I'm getting closer and closer to leaving and still the majority of it all seems very surreal.

Im excited but nervous, and thats ok. Im also stoked for my vacation in July, going to Montreal for five days with friends! No longer getting ink while I'm away but oh will I enjoy those doughnuts and poutines. There is so much to see and do Im not sure we will get to it all but it will be great!

So on some healthier information i've been running again I'm on week two of the couch to 5k.  It's getting easier so I think next week will kick me in the teeth. However, I am moving forward and feeling better about it all the time.

I just need to finally find out what is wrong with my lungs and ear, and i will be ready for anything. Im hoping to find a solution to my breathing problem weather it be a puffer or just a dietary thing. I'll be happy with a solution the issue instead of a patch work job. I like to make things that last a long time.

I have so much sewing to do in the next little while and I'm not sure when ill get to it but I'm going to try my best to stay ahead of it all. Just like practicing and looking for opportunities to preform. Im hoping to get my stuff together enough to hit a few open mi nights this month.

Now that is my next/last few weeks in a nut shell.

Two jobs and time inbetween

It's been a while, but I have not forgotten. I have finished all my finals, moved home settled in and found two jobs. I work full time ish hours working in a temp agency office and at a hard wear store.

I do enjoy both my jobs however I work really weird hours. My next step,is finding places and ways to,perform weather it be in a musical, singing at open mic night, or finding a band to do weddings with. I love to perform and it's a huge part of what I want to do.

I'm looking to pick people's brains I how best to go about this while I still practice and learn in a traditional manner.

I'm in a great place I just have to,stay motivated and remember that it isn't always about work.

Finals

FINALS! I have completed Three of my five finals, one tonight and one tomorrow at noon. Im so tried and mentally drained but so close to finishing I'm not sure what to do with myself.

The great debate of the moment is do I want a sandwich or a burger for dinner. SO I am so good right now.

I can do this and will soon be done my undergrad!

Running

Some mornings I wake up and Want to leave. I just want to go and not come back until I'm ready. Some days I want to walk through books as an observer, other times as a minor character. I want to see and experience the world and I want it so bad it hurts me to be still. Other days I want to see this world and all it's wonders not just the things we see on tv or in movies but actually go to these places. However standing on the edge of this scares me beyond all reason. I am going to see and experience all the things I can in this world because I can't stand still. 
Never have I been able to be stagnant some times people get left behind but I will not slow down to satisfy others. I leave in less then a year to go away and I may not come back, I probably will but it has always been a matter of time before I leave again. It takes everything in me some days not to just pick a direction and run. Today is one of those days. I have not left my house or the campus is almost a month. I could leave right now and have no regrets. I do have promises to keep and a degree that is so close to finished that there is a counter on my blog counting down the days. So If I some times seem distant it's because my body is here but my mind is not.

I do not make promises I will not do everything in my power to keep. So finishing this degree and not running away immediately is very difficult to me. 

Im going to make the best of being home for 8 months even with only a dream drinking me forward. 

Exciting Week

So this week has been great. I've gotten all my homework done, and things for my recital are finally falling into place. I'm getting excited , trying really hard to fight through my anxiety and keeping in a positive head space. One more midterm next week then I'm free until finals.